How to work effectively with a difficult boss


  • Home
  • Books
  • Discussion Forums
  • Articles
  • Useful Sites
  • Vault
  • Press Releases
  • RSS News Feed
  • Corporate Sponsors
  • FAQ
  • About Us
  • Contact
  • Privacy
  • Add to iFaves

    Key Books

    How to Manage Your Boss: Developing the Perfect Working Relationship

    Who's Pulling Your Strings?: How to Break the Cycle of Manipulation and Regain Control of Your Life

    Games Bosses Play: 36 Career Busters Your Supervisor May Be Firing Your Way and How You Can Defend Yourself

    [Back to message list] [Reply to this topic] [Start a new topic]

    Jealous older women bosses!

    Posted by: CB4721
    Date: 1/4/2006 8:52:44 PM

    Why is it that (some) older women as bosses attempt to sabatage us X, Y, and Me generations? We work hard and get along with our coworkers, do good work, yet some of those older woman as bosses give the rest a bad name by demonstrating passive aggressive and just plain mean behavior toward us? Jealousy...maybe? Please express your opinions, tell your story and help each other out. This discussion board should help some of us learn to deal with something that may be unavoidable...

    Reply from: Karra
    Date: 1/7/2006 1:03:00 AM
    Reply: Mean, how? And are you sure you don't have it the other way around? Or maybe it works both ways? It might be more fair to say that women are harder on other women in the work place, regardless of age, and quick to sabotage one other. Perhaps we can't get away from competing for male attention or approval? But that’s generalizing. And I've seen men too going at each other's throats, being catty, and gossiping. I think it’s easier to get along with colleagues when you’re young because when you’re young you usually don’t have power. As soon as you get power you get people trying to take it away. One of my clients is a woman everyone is absolutely terrified of. In our first meeting she sat literally glaring at me across the table… and I thought yikes this is someone I would be dealing with almost daily! While we still aren’t pals, she has turned out to be fair, professional, and actually great to work with. She makes her expectations clear, and shows appreciation for work done. She does not chit chat or engage in “girly” behavior. If she were a guy I think people would think she was great, yet because she’s a woman who doesn’t behave “girly” they seem to resent her or be intimidated by her. Why do we expect our female bosses to smile and be friendly at work but not our male bosses?

    Reply from: mindym22
    Date: 1/8/2006 9:00:00 PM
    Reply: Yes women are post on another topic applies here as well: As a woman I hate to say this, but I have had better luck with male bosses. Women can be very catty, petty and jealous. A few years ago I worked in an office with 2 female bosses, and 5 other women. One of the female bosses was, well lets just say she was very sloppy in dressing and NOT attractive. A woman started in the office who was very good with clients and a very good performer. She was in her 20's and looked like a model. The boss was constantly on her case, waiting for her to make a mistake. The new employee was very eager to do well and took her comments in stride. Until one day, when the manager went a litle too far. She screamed at the poor woman for a very minor mistake. The employee calmly responed. This only enraged the manager more who shouted louder, and walked towards her, pointing her finger in her face about 2 inches away from her nose. She must have had enough at this point because she said"get your finger out of my face, what you are doing right now is bordering on assault" The other manager stepped in after hearing the commotion and calmed the first manager down. The younger woman was or course quite upset. We tried to calm her down but she was literally shaking. She excused herself, we thought she was going to ladies room, but we looked outside 5 min later and her car was gone. She called the district manager, and said she had felt threatened by her boss's behavior, and removed herself from the situation. She was then tranferred to another location. Women have a tendency to get too emotional, or try to show tough they are.

    Reply from: Karra
    Date: 1/8/2006 11:51:00 PM
    Reply: It does sound like your boss was jealous and abusive, and certainly emotionally unstable. I wonder if the younger women will learn from their experiences with the older ones, and be more fair when they are old? Over the past year I was stuck listening to a group of individuals who were engaged in bad mouthing another female co-worker on a daily basis (who was an exceptional worker). It escalated from gossip to attack on every aspect of her life. I guess what they call "mobbing". Five people were involved and yeah, I'm sorry to say, all except for one were women. It was really depressing, the whole thing. It's an open environment and this was abusive as well to those of us who had to listen to that. These individuals are bullies who found each other, who only know how to feel good about themselves by attacking others, and who derived a sense of power from the abuse. I wonder if it's frustration and powerlessness at work that drives some women to be catty and jealous?

    Reply from: cjdawgct
    Date: 3/13/2009 4:16:00 PM
    Reply: I am a seasoned professional and have been in the work place for a long time. I hold an MBA and have some grat talent! Three jobs I held, I was asked to leave and the requests were from were all from female bosses! In these particulat three jobs, I was ganged up on. RIDICULOUS! I will never ever work for a female boss again, especially if their names are Nancy, Colleen or Barbara

    Reply from: TimeTime
    Date: 11/2/2009 6:48:00 AM
    Reply: So, jealous older women bosses are all over the place. After my master degree, I started working for a company. When I joined, I was the only one young woman in the entire office of more than 50 people. I had this older Indian woman as my boss, she is just crazy and very scary. She smiles and talks very nice when everyone is around, but once I was w. her in a room, she looked at me like I killed her father and rolled her eyes like 10 times when talking to me. She would do lota unnecessary things to make me look bad. Once I was trying to fill out a day off form. But, it was my first time doing that. So, I asked her which column to fill in, she told me to fill in like column A. So, I did that and submitted to the HR. The HR then sent me and the manager an email saying that I filled out the wrong column. Then that woman boss, she replied to me and the HR in a very bad tone saying, who asked me to fill out column A, it should column B, and asked me to be careful next time. She is simply crazy.

    Reply from: TimeTime
    Date: 11/2/2009 7:04:00 AM
    Reply: But, on my first job. I did work for a very understanding and supporting woman boss. However, she is young. So, I believe younger generation women are doing a better job. I hope these jealous older women bosses would be greatly reduced in the next generation.

    Reply from: Me Too
    Date: 7/1/2012 12:25:00 PM
    Reply: I have the same problem except I am older and the women I work with are younger. They are jealous because I am in better shape and look better at 40 than they do in their 20s and 30's. I just stay quiet, say good morning, and do my work because one of them got $5000 for bringing in our manager. They are slowly turning him against me. I just keep my focus on doing the job.

    To reply to this topic or add a comment, just complete our 20-second registration process which is free and confidential. If you have already registered, you need to log in.


    Have you ever quit or changed positions because of your boss?
    Three times
    More than 3 times

    [view responses]


    Registration is confidential, free, and has a number of benefits.

    User: PW:
    RegisterLost password


    Advanced Search

    Popular Items

    Corporate Sponsors is completely free for both individual and corporate use. Corporate sponsorship opportunities are available.

    Copyright � 2007 The CMR Group. All Rights Reserved.
    No part of this site may be copied or reused without express written permission.
    All trademarks are properties of their respective owners. Privacy policy.