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EROTOMANIC STALKER BOSS
Posted by: Virginia
Date: 4/23/2006 12:33:18 AM
MY PREVIOUS BOSS WAS OBSESSED WITH ME IN THAT HE DID NOT TAKE A VACATION IN THE ENTIRE TIME I WORKED FOR HIM (7 YEARS). HE WAS THERE ALMOST EVERY WORK DAY IN THESE 7 YEARS -- NO TRAVEL, NO BLOCKS OF VACATION. HE WAS OUT ABOUT 4 DAYS A YEAR, NON-CONSECUTIIVE. BECAUSE OF THIS OBSESSIVE BEHAVIOR, I BELIEVE HE HAS EROTOMANIC STALKER SYNDROME. HE IS OBSESSED WITH ME, AND NEEDS TO BE AROUND ME WHENEVER HE CAN. HE HAS A FAMILY TOO, BUT CHOSE TO BE AROUND ME INSTEAD. HIS DEMEANER IS LAZY, IRRESPONSIBLE AND UNCOOPERATIVE. HE WAS A GENERAL NUISANCE, NOT A TEAM PLAYER. HIS POSITION IS SUCH THAT HE CAN DOLE OUT WORK, BUT WOULD NOT DO THAT, I BELIEVE AS AN EXCUSE TO BE AROUND ME AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. I SWITCHED TO ANOTHER BOSS A WHILE BACK, BUT THIS FORMER BOSS IS GOING OUT OF HIS WAY TO GO PAST MY DESK EVERY DAY. HOW CAN I GET HIM TO STOP SEXUALLY HARRASSING ME? VIRGINIA
| Reply from: |
goodboss |
| Date: |
4/27/2006 12:31:00 PM |
| Reply: |
First, stop typing all in caps. It's very hard to read and gives people the impression you're a little crazy.
Second, your boss not taking any vacation time + walking past your desk is in no way evidence that he's sexually harassing you or that he's an erotomaniac. If this is all that's going on, then you are not being sexually harassed and he's not an erotomaniac. (He must have to walk past other employees' desks too, does this mean he's sexually harassing them too?) Why does this bother you? |
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| Reply from: |
Virginia |
| Date: |
4/28/2006 8:18:00 PM |
| Reply: |
YOU ARE DEFENDING YOUR OWN GUILTY BEHAVIOR BY PRETENDING NOT TO UNDERSTAND. |
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| Reply from: |
thumper1023 |
| Date: |
5/7/2006 10:10:00 AM |
| Reply: |
Does he speak to you? Maybe you need a pocket recorder. Are there other walkways for him to use, other than going past your desk. Maybe you need a pocket camera. There are ways to document what you think might be happening. Make sure to keep a written journal also. Because if something is going on that you find to be harassment, your superiors that you go to to tell, might not believe you.
You take the right steps in dealing with this, like documentation, notifying the chain of command (this is where it must stop, the harassment that is. The company must make every effort to stop it.) Then if that does'nt work, you go to the EEOC and file a complaint with them. They will do an investigation. But keep in mind that you are not at fault and no matter what the outcome (it could get ugly, these days you must be able to prove it.) you took your stand on stopping work place harassment. |
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| Reply from: |
Slider397 |
| Date: |
6/8/2006 12:02:00 PM |
| Reply: |
I disagree with goodboss and side with thumper who is giving you good advice. Document, document, document. Don't put the blame on the one feeling "uncomfortable" and that is the criteria--the perception of the receiver. I do not say "victim" because there is not a case built yet. Go to HR now. They also have the responsibility to keep this confidential and do everything they can to prevent any retribution. Assuming they have a zero tolerance policy, take them up on it and protect your rights. |
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