Navigation

Key Books

You Want Me to Do What?: When, Where, and How to Draw the Line at Work

Problem Bosses: Who They Are and How to Deal With Them

169 Ways to Score Points With Your Boss

[Back to message list] [Reply to this topic] [Start a new topic]

Abuse

Posted by: Abused Worker
Date: 9/25/2008 9:44:27 AM

I am the assistant to our Human Resources Manager. Normally, he is a kind individual and seems to respect his fellow employees BUT when the going gets tough, he turns into this monster.

Let me back up and give you a little background of my past....15 years ago, I was in an abusive marriage mentally and physically. I did not think I would ever get out of the marriage alive. He threatened me all the time that if I ever left him, he would kill me. It took me one year of counseling (behind his back) to ease my way out of the relationship and get a divorce. It was a living hell....but I made it out alive.

Back to my boss....usually my boss is a good person but when the pressure is on, he takes it out on the staff....not everyone....he has his chosen few that he picks on.....me being one of those few. I have taken his hollering and throwing things so much and have hidden as much as possible when I can...why I don't know..but I think it goes back to my abusive marriage...at fist I hid the entire abuse then it was too much and I couldn't take it anymore. The other day my boss can into the office hollering at me accusing me of some mistakes that were going to "cost him"....he yelled and yelled...I looked up at him and all I could do was cry....and cry....and cry...I begin to have flashbacks of my past marriage when my boss begins his yelling...and i go into meltdown mode.

The last incident happened several weeks ago, and since then, I have been out on Leave of Absence trying to get on medication to help me cope. I am scared that I may lose my job.

Back several years ago, an incident happened in our office and our Vice President found out about it. He called me and another co-worker into his office to see exactly what happened. He made me promise, that if this ever happened again, that I would come tell him. Well, if would go tell him about this past incident; however, I am scared that my boss will lose his job and I don't want to be the one to blame.

I having been looking for other positions within our company and within the past 6 months there has been nothing interesting. I have been applying for jobs throughout our city and surrounding cities, but cannot seem to land a job. I am middle aged and I really feel that my age has a lot to do with it.

I have no choice but to return to this job, as soon as the doctor releases me. I will try to avoid my boss, if/when these incidents happen again until I find something else....just hope my mental health survives.

Abused & Bruised Employee

To reply to this topic or add a comment, just complete our 20-second registration process which is free and confidential. If you have already registered, you need to log in.

[top]

Login

Registration is confidential, free, and has a number of benefits.