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You Want Me to Do What?: When, Where, and How to Draw the Line at Work
When Smart People Work For Dumb Bosses
Mobbing: Emotional Abuse in the American Workplace, 2002 Revised Edition
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Need/Advise on my work situation with my BOSS. quite severe. PLEASE READ
Posted by: ppmafioso
Date: 7/3/2008 4:52:09 AM
Hello everyone, I have just joined this forums as I am desperate for help. Let me give you some facts about my boss and work palce first of: -When I started, 7 months ago, we were 7 in the office, including the boss and the sub-boss his cousin. There is now only me and the 2 bosses, me being the only employee you can guess the hassell I get. -Of the 4 that left, 1 left because of money issues, 2 were fired for being "incompetent" (eventho one was a phsycologist and the other a qualified lawyer) and the final one left simply because the boss bullied her way to much and she couldnt take it (she was pregnant and she elft with depression because of the boss situation) - Boss has severe temper problems, illogical thinking, no manners/respect, possible drug adiction, among other things. One day he can be fine, and the next can be hell, I absolutely detest being here and him. He will go mad one minute for nothing, and the next minute be fine. Example of conflict: I am sent to the post office to pick up a important packadge for my boss, they cannot find it or do not have it, I call him while I am there and tell him "they cant find it or its not there" he then goes bezerk at me saying "I told you to pick the packadge up and I sujest you do just that!" Repeatedly threatens to fire me, harrases me, threatens me, insults me, etc. What can I do? Can anyone pelase give me advise? I really dont know what to do except leave... but I really dont want to do that! Thanks alot for your time and help, I look forward to hearing from you. Jack
| Reply from: |
goodboss |
| Date: |
7/3/2008 6:34:00 AM |
| Reply: |
Unfortunately, this kind of behaviour isn't illegal, so you have no legal recourse. You could talk to your boss about it, however, from your post he doesn't seem to be the kind of person who'll respond well to something like this. It may even make matters worse for you. So leaving may be your only option. I recommend you do two things, starting now: 1) begin your job search, and 2) document this guy's behaviour thoroughly. The second thing is important because if you end up having to leave before you get a new job, you MIGHT (notice the emphasis on "might" this is not necessarily gonna happen) have a better chance of getting UI or EI benefits in spite of resigning, because you'll have documented evidence that your boss really was intolerable. |
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| Reply from: |
mellow_guy |
| Date: |
7/4/2008 8:42:00 PM |
| Reply: |
Jack,
First, my sympathy goes out to you for the toxic, rude, unethical, and unprofessional that you endured from your boss. Since you don't have any other recourse such as talking to his superior or perhaps a Human Resources Department about your situation, your only option (in order to maintain your sanity) is to find another job and leave. Not knowing your financial situation, I think that it is sometimes in your best interest to leave this job even before you can find another job. After all, being in this toxic environment would negatively impact other parts of your life. If you can't find a permanent job in the short term, I think doing contract work is a good option. To make you feel better, I was in a similar type of environment in past jobs -- I was of course very angry and frustrated, but looking back, it made me better off because it pushed me look for another job (which was so much better). |
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| Reply from: |
rustynail |
| Date: |
7/5/2008 6:47:00 AM |
| Reply: |
Hello Iam in the same situation you must write down everything they say and do. do this everyday very important. then when they get rid of you beleive me they will. you can then nail them take them to court and sue them for every cent they have
Regards Rustynail |
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| Reply from: |
goodboss |
| Date: |
7/8/2008 12:01:00 PM |
| Reply: |
rustynail, unfortunately you have a very naive view about what's legal and what isn't. |
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| Reply from: |
boss_sucks_dung |
| Date: |
8/16/2008 4:16:00 PM |
| Reply: |
I'm wondering why he hasn't fired you yet. Hmmmm, why threaten firing repeatedly but not actually do it?
Sounds like he's working up to it with you, though. Maybe he's dragging his feet since he has so little staff left? I bet when he hires more people, you'll be on the chopping block next.
Let us know what happens, please. |
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| Reply from: |
boss_sucks_dung |
| Date: |
8/16/2008 4:17:00 PM |
| Reply: |
Ppmafioso, I forgot to ask, WHY do you even want to stay and work for this nutcase? |
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| Reply from: |
butterpatlady |
| Date: |
8/25/2008 8:07:00 PM |
| Reply: |
RUN, don't walk, from that situation. Then pray for the guy, he needs help and you are NOT the person to give it to him. I have been in that situation myself, I work in a profession that has an abundance of self-involved, egomaniacs (the "design" industry) and bully bosses are the norm instead of the exception. I have had to fight for my sanity but have found that a belief in a "higher power" (call it whatever you want, a creator, a higher judge) helps me deal with the hurt and my desire to be treated fairly and with respect.
But aside from my belief that prayer helps ME deal with an unfair, unjust, hurtful boss, the fact is most bully bosses cannot be reasoned with. Unless you are in a large company with a progressive HR department, there isn't a lot you can do except keep your own house clean and start looking for another job. Don't burn bridges as you leave. Keep a journal, not for legal reasons(although it can't hurt if it comes to that) - but for your sanity. You can "vent" on paper and later review your reactions, sometimes this will help you plan better responses to these situations in the future.
My sympathies go out to you, please leave that environment as soon as you can, there is little you can do in a small office. This guy is sick and you can't heal him, all you can do is escape his toxic environment. In the US, look for local groups that are promoting Work Place Bulling legislation, there are some that are trying to get laws on the books to give employees a chance in situations like yours. In most states, unless you can prove sexual harrassment in a toxic boss/employee relationship there isn't much you can do legally. One or two states may have some form of legislation active, so check in your area for support.
Be strong. Remember, this person is sick with an illness that probably won't be healed while on this earth. Get yourself away from him as soon as you can. |
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